I'LL LIVE!

Yup,it's true.I'm still among the living.I made it to the hospital.For future reference,there is a hospital in Tyler that I recommend you not going to for lack of people that know what they are there to do,or HOW to do it with patience.
Long story short....in the end.I wound up at my local hospital (smaller)hospital ....that is,after my temper tantrum after waiting 3 hours at my designated hospital and getting poked numerous times with what seemed like the HUGEST needle in the world by the rudest heffer I've ever met! So I split and went to get real help.
I am now on birth control and that is supposed to make things right.I had a few tests run,and all they can say is they have ruled out the worste things,but were pretty vague about what started the whole thing.OK...so I might have been better off staying at the hospital I was told to come back to....but I was about to hit someone if I had to wait on the NEXT freakin' shift to come to try and take my blood,which was their brilliant plan!
I can admit that it's my own ugly sorted past that eventually had them finally get a vein close to my heart.THAT was scarey as hell....but it's my fault I am the way I am.When the witch got mad and threw my past up in my face in a nasty manner,I got hostile.I don't need anybody to kick me in the ass for what I done.I do enough kicking my OWN self in the ass.Yes,she hit a nerve talking to me like that,and yes the truth hurts sometimes,but I'm quite sure I'm not the FIRST case that has come through those hospital doors w/ veins like mine....or the lack of veins,should I say.No matter how many times I apologized for all the time it was taking,and the effort,I still got rammed with what seemed like a pencil and with no concern at all when I kept saying "OUCH!!!" I know a flabotomists'(sp)job can't be easy,and I feel for them...but to raise your voice at me when I am nearly coming off the table with pain from the ruthless stabbing I was getting,was TOO DAMN much for me to deal with.It made my mother even cry!
So BELIEVE me! I got some calls to make tomorrow.I wasn't asking for sympathy...but can't THEY be the least bit sympathetic?I mean,even though it's obvious my fault that my arms had battle wounds from many years ago.Still,that witch and her accomplice had no right to condemn me.One....just ONE of the EXACT things she said to me was "OHHH HUSH!YOU CAN TAKE IT! YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS BEFORE YOU DID THE CRAP YOU DID"!!and "I'M NOT HURTING YOU"!! I have a high tolerance for pain dammit,and I think I know when I get dizzy and am about to barf from the pain!
Awww hellll nooooo! I paid dearly for my "crap" (as she plainly put it)many times over(still do inside) and haven't been that route in AGES! So F'K EM'!!
OK,now that I got that off my damn chest.I probably should sign off,because it's thundering and lightening.Bad weather and dial-up don't mix.I could wind up w/ a fried computer.Now wouldn't THAT just top off a swell day?
UuGH! Gotta go peel off all the bandaide thingy's I got from the torture chamber,take a shower and go to bed and pout and maybe beat my pillow till I go to sleep.
UuGH!