Uncle smashed by other uncle in between semi

First off...this isn't my typical uncle.This happens to be the Uncle that raised me for a few years during teen years.Him & my Aunt,that is.Then if you'll recall,my "X" Ray and I lived w/ them for 2 years ...then behind them and helped my uncle care for my sick aunt.Teary-eyed,but smiling,my best memory of my uncle was when I lived w/ them as a teen,and he bought me my first car.He actually traded a riding lawn mower and $50 for a Pinto when I was 14.They were the best.Well,he's gone to see Jesus now,and I'm ok with that.He was am angel here on earth and just earned his angel wings for Heaven! But it still hurts knowing that they loved me unconditionally,no matter how many times other family members said I was a BAD BAD child,they said "bullshit"!!What happened was my mothers' brother(my Unc.)was backing a semi trailer and it was already jack-knifed.My Uncle just happened to be standing there and the clutch or ?whatever gear slipped?and in a split second my precious uncle was smashed in between until his entire body turned black.He whispered a few times"I can't breathe",and died in the flight for life helicopter bringing him to Tyler from Winnsboro.
Thinking back before this tragedy,this don't seem right...b/c the thing is....since he's 74 I MADE him go to the doctors appt I arranged just to be tested for anything that he didn't know about so we could take preventive measures,ya know? So after the many many tests came back,the doctor told us "Ya know....you DO have a problem...your ONLY problem is you wasted your time coming here for this checkup b/c you are as healthy as anyone can be"!!! This adoreable man got up at 6am and went non-stop all day like a 30 year old.I've always been amazed at how he could even keep 2 or 3 girlfriends at a time,work a day job along w/ other youngsters in 100 degree heat,yet never complain.
My other Uncle that smashed him to death must feel so bad.I can't even imagine.I'll be going over there today.I was gona go already,but the rest of my family and all their friends have been there round the clock.So I decided to let things calm a bit,if that's even possible,and go today.
If anybody remembers.....my uncle that died is the same uncle(and aunt) that I help drive to California to their son's funeral,who found out one month his heart and liver were wrapped w/ cancer and then died in a matter of days after finding out the diagnoses.Another family tragedy.
Will I EVER be able to go back to fun/happy/silly posts?
Guess time will tell.